Monday, January 31, 2011


                    I came across a website that shows snaps taken of random freaks at Wal-Mart. After I finished drying my eyes from the tear jerking laughter, I realized that many of the people featured on the site resembled many of the people I pass by at my local WM. I have seen many large people wearing way too small clothing letting it all hang out. I have seen the outdated mullets that never should have been in style to begin with. Let's face it, the only men that could pull off a mullet are 1)Patrick Swayze and 2) Kurt Russell. Unless you are Kurt Russell (May PS rest in peace) go get a haircut NOW! And in my personal opinion, no woman can pull off a mullet, I really wish these ladies would stop trying. I admit I have also been witness to camel toe, nipple flash, talon/claw nails, neon hair, clothes with so many holes in them they are more like holes waiting in a long winding line being separated only by cloth strips.
                    When I have to run to the store, I make sure to wash my face, make a pony tail, and put on a clean shirt. If I am wearing make up I wash that off because I don't want to appear overdressed for the occasion. That whole "no shirt no shoes no service" spiel is evidently not in effect at Wal-Mart as I have seen many farmer tanned little-uns running around barefoot, and the parents too! Another one I hate is the woman that thinks she can pull off running to the store in her PJs. Not cool! I don't care how youthful you look, unless you are young enough to wear footie pajamas, change your clothes! You are not cute anymore, now you're just sad and weird. When I was a teen pajamas were for bed time not grocery shopping, and chanclas (flip flops) are NOT shoes! Especially in the winter.
                   My neighbor and I once talked about the people we come across in WM and we had noticed that there was not one person we could relate to in there. If I feel overdressed wearing a little makeup she must feel like a prom queen at a monster truck rally since she's usually in work attire. And I admit of the two of us, I am more plain as I do not usually wear makeup and have a limited wardrobe. But I am a neat person that will not leave the house without taking a shower and putting on some clean clothing. You know, basic hygiene, life lessons that apparently have not been taught in my area since the introduction of Westernized civilization.
                    To avoid the swarm of "Git R Done" tee shirt wearing mullet heads I usually go shopping late at night or early in the morning. If I must shop during the weekend, I prefer to go to Publix. The higher prices are worth the atmosphere alone. It's so nice to go into a store and see people more like you, people that bathe daily and know that pantyhose are not leggings and therefore cannot be worn alone (Yes, I've seen that too). I suppose I could complain to management but chances are he/she won't really care as the mullet heads are their biggest consumers. I can't blame them though, I shop there for the rock bottom prices on many items including groceries. But at what cost?
                      I've never been good at conformity, and in the town I live in, I am very grateful for this characteristic. I absolutely refuse to take even less pride in my appearance (Lord! There would be nothing left!) just so I can fit in. I do wish it wouldn't be bad etiquette to point out some of these peoples fashion faux pas though. I can only imagine,  "Excuse me ma'am, but I do believe your buttocks is hanging out of your daisy dukes" then to my surprise the "ma'am" would turn out to be a dude. Yes, I've seen that too.

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