Friday, November 15, 2013


Have you ever tasted something so delectable that you savored it for a moment before swallowing? And throughout the rest of the meal you find yourself savoring each and every single bite until you're down to one last morsel and that's the one you savor the longest. Chewing slowly and possibly even making inappropriate sounds as you're enjoying it. Well, that's how I try to live my life, savoring every single morsel. There is an enormous amount of life in life and I want to appreciate and enjoy all of it, even the parts that quite frankly suck. But what is a meal without a vegetable? The parts that suck are the lessons of life. It's as if The Universe is saying, "Okay, enough dessert, here, have some broccoli". And that's alright. Broccoli is not the end of the meal, it's actually the best part. Despite the fact that it may not taste good, it's the nutrition you need to keep going. See where I'm going with this? Once you've had your veggies, you get dessert!
Alright, enough food analogies, I'm getting hungry.
What I'm saying is, life is meant to be enjoyed, including all the hiccups. Life, however, will not be enjoyable if all you see are hiccups. Life is hard, no doubt about that, but if all you have is hard you may want to revamp some things. People are so set in their ways and afraid to break out of their comfort zones that they just drone on and have absolutely no fulfillment at all. I refuse to be one of these drones. Don't get me wrong, I have bad days just like anyone else, but I do not have a bad life. Ah, that's the difference. Too often do we accept a slew of bad days as a bad life. This is tragic. My philosophy is quite simple. If you don't like something change it. I have heard the arguments, "You don't know how hard that is!" "I can't just change it!" To them I say "Stop making excuses!" Who says you can't change things you don't like? If you don't like where you live, save money and move. If you don't make enough money, work more and then move. If you don't like whom you are with, break up. But you don't want to be the bad guy? Trust me, staying in a bad relationship makes you the bad guy. If you don't like your job, quit. Want to take on a new career path, go to school. No money for school? Student loans, second jobs, and grants. Trust me it will be worth the effort in the end.
And don't give me this bull-pucky about the time and effort it would take to change because that's just an excuse. According to you your life already sucks, right? So, wouldn't making it suck for a positive change be worth it? It's going to suck anyway, so why not make it suck to your advantage?
My life is in shambles at the moment. And I'm okay with that. Why you ask? Well, because the end result will be spectacular! Chaos almost always precedes change. And really, isn't change what I needed?
What we need and what we want are too often confused with one another. I wanted stability but I needed some change. Can't have change without chaos. Don't misunderstand me, stability is quite important, but the right kind of stability, not of the mediocre variety. Getting by is simply not enough for a big spirit like me. For too long was I being stuffed into a box in which I simply didn't fit.
Here's where I am now, I am on a journey. My journey has taken me to new places and I've encountered new people. Some have given my life value and some have taught me about the type of person I don't want to be. Taking a shot is scary, especially when you don't know where to aim. So, I'm taking random shots just hoping to hit a target. But man oh man is it something to hear the gun go off! (Got that last line from a movie)
I have told a few people my life story, and it's a doozy! There are times when a person hearing my story will get a look on their face that I know all too well. To them I have always said the same thing, "Don't pity me. I don't do pity." And when told of my bravery I always say the same thing, "Are you kidding me??? I'm not brave! I'm scared out of my mind! But I have to keep going! I can't have come this far to turn and run back now!" My end result may still be far off. In the eyes of naysayers I may be lost, but I know for a fact that I am more found than they can comprehend. I stay true to myself and savor every morsel of life. Right now, I'm just finishing my broccoli.

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